Stripper Cutter

I have never told anyone this, PLEASE help (sexual abuse?)?
O.k first, I feel like a pervert cause this may not be true. I suspect I was sexually abused because something has always been WAY wrong with me. I was a cutter in my middle school years, a drinker in my high school years, a stripper later, and now my marriage is in the dumps because I have 3 daughters and am paranoid of my husband. HELP, how do I know? ! Oh, and on the husband thing I can see its delusional afterwards, so thats not my que, and on the stripper thing please don't judge, it was many yrs ago.
I have also just always had this feeling, but feel too gross to ever bring it up. I know my father slept with 16 yr olds, but I haven't seen him since I was 6.
One of the very BEST books you can purchase is "The Courage to Heal" by Ellen Bass. There is also a workbook to use in conjunction with the book. The book also has sections that can be shared with your husband to help him be supportive of you.
Sexual abuse survivors can have a lot of different ways that their abuse was handled, cutting, drinking, being a stripper are all just symptoms .
I would suggest that you get in contact with a therapist who has experience with sexual abuse survivors. You CAN heal from abuse and you WILL heal given support.
Good luck and hang in there,
Tex
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